is this called living, or something else?
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please leave me here, because everything that happened; happened here. everything i became has been recorded and recollected in these pages, and one day when they try to place my being beneath the ground and the flowers wilt, the grass withers, and the trees grow old too soon, they will know why. im the elephant in the room, the discarded milk teeth under your pillow, and ive grown to accept that i'm everything inside yourself you hate (even if you cant see it yet). leave before you find me familiar, and begin to crave the beating rhythms of my heart or the bitterness pooling under my tongue. my name is not necessary, nor is where i am from, you can ask me questions but i doubt you would want too. just know, i am not the one you've been looking for, and you will not grow to love me. i have nobody and i am nobody.
you've got a second chance, you could go home.

im going to be honest, I don’t know when things got this out of control. i can’t function. im siting at asda (which is a five minute walk from my house) waiting for my mum to come and pick me up because i cant walk home, my legs won’t take me, my heart is straining under the weight of my chest. i cannot continue to be this way and expect to live, live a life worth anything at all. I cannot keep being admitted to hospital with heart arrhythmias due to low potassium, i cannot kid myself into thinking that a bmi of 14.3 is okay. people don’t live this way, they die, and im being bold and saying I do not want to die. I’m so very lost and i am aware of it, and that’s the worst part, because i can’t pull myself out from here, i can’t, and im sorry.

4 days ago | Permalink

Always have been. (by hottfff)


Please accept this gif of Elena as a token of my gratitude, all the messages and e-mails you guys send me are amazing and I appreciate every single one of you.


Daughter - Live in Los Angeles